Archive Archive: I Want Him To Be My (Sexual) Fix

February 2019

Name: Anonymous

Message: I don’t want to be in a relationship and I wanna have sex but I don’t want me to come off has easy or a hoe. There’s this one guy that I feel has the potential to be my fix when I need it. I have second guess myself because I do take pride in my vagina and opening up to someone. I just wouldn’t want him to think less of me. I have been withholding her from sexual activities for a whole year, she wants attention. What should I do?

Hey Anonymous,

It’s totally understandable the place you are. I’m actually in that same place believe it or not lol. It’s been about two years for me personally. I think the main things that are so important to women like us are trust, comfort, and intent. We don’t want to share our bodies with any ole body and we want/need a certain level of and trust in the bond where we feel comfortable crossing that line. You want to know the person, not just use or be used for sex. Establishing a FWB (friends with benefits) relationship would be the cure-all. In order to establish that kind of relationship you’d have to be honest with yourself and the person. Make sure you want what you say you want and relay that upfront. Just take a leap of faith and shoot your shot with the guy you’re interested in. You don’t want a relationship, so you don’t need to worry about the complications dating can bring. Establish a friendship; a mutual connection and familiarity with the guy, and go for it. Just be sure to be transparent with your intent. There’s nothing to lose here as long as you’re open and honest. The label '“hoe” is placed upon people who don’t even engage in alleged “hoe” behavior whatever that is (because it’s interpreted differently by many) so who cares as long as you aren’t messy, are being safe, is honest with all parties and are happy with your choices. Go for it!

I hope this advice helps you. -K